Soul versus Ego and Paradise Found
Myself, Eve & Lexi, the day we found our new home for "Kindred Spirits"
Its been about 2 1/2 months since we have been living our life as promising new homesteaders with dreams of creating a permaculture paradise and holistic healing centre for all Living Beings. So many ideas, so many wonderful projects, can’t wait to start them all, all at the same time!
Wood shack we need to temporarily convert into stables, until the new stables are built. Cane we do it?
Wait thats not going to happen though. Sadness, worry, fear sets in. What was I thinking! 54 year old woman with her 2 daughters and volunteers girls, we are going to create all this, all this by ourselves? Really?! Now the power of women can be a mighty power, but lifting a log, carrying water up a steep hill, lugging lumber across the property, its not going to happen, in my wildest dreams, or nightmares for that matter!
We had to fell trees that were dangerously uprooting because of a storm. Now they will be our future home!
So the Ego takes over, the doubts begin, the worry, the fear, here we go!
Now I don’t mean the Ego as “I am the best, the strongest etc” I believe we have a Soul and we also have an Ego. The Soul is our authentic self which connects our physical body to our spirit. You can see it as what your heart feels is right, what inspires you, what unconditional love is, where dreams and creations come from.
The Ego is that part of the rational mind, which has its purpose to protect us, without it we would just be floating around and probablybe getting into a lot of trouble. However if it takes over, its job is to take us down.
My changes of heart and indecisiveness have been driving my daughters crazy. Time to get a grip!
I need to get back to that place of inner peace, where my mind isn’t going crazy and making me doubt my every move.
View from the ridge down to the volunteer house , now named "Home Tree" by our Australian volunteer. In case your wondering, its out of the movie "Avatar". We tend to name animals and places from our favourite movies. More about that maybe in another Blog?
So, I went to the top of the ridge to look down upon our home, the trees, the land and reflect on life, my life. I practiced some Ujjayi breath, an ancient Yogic breathing technique which has a balancing influence and helps to release feelings of irritation and frustration, calming the mind & body. I was in need of some of that!
Palm trees shimmering on the mountain top.
From there I slipped into Alpha “a mental state of relaxed awareness.” Here I could become aware of how I really felt and what was going on. Where my fears were coming from, were they justified? I needed to surpass this and move on to where I could think from a place of reason combined with the creative mind if I was going to succeed.
It helped me to realize, that no, I can’t do, create and have everything RIGHT NOW. That I had to be patient, to take each step at a time. To enjoy the journey and not only look to the goal. Which is how I work with our horses and now I needed to take this advice for myself.
Noble Jasper, ponders on his new world.
So here I am , from a place of awareness, I am ready to enjoy every moment of this creation, of life, of the time spent with my 2 daughters together here with me for that. By the end of next year they will be moving on to their own adventures. But right now they are with me. The horses are enjoying their new found pastures, the dogs are free and discovering every nook and cranny on the land and Toby the cat, has his hunting paradise.
Dixon our 3 month old, at the time, Ridgeback, following his big brother Felix!
Big brother Felix (Giant Schnauzer) walked the whole perimeter of the 2 1/2 hectares, proclaiming his territory!
That moment we brought the horses to their new home and rode up the little dirt road I knew for sure, this was RIGHT, this was our home. Lexi, my older daughter,said to me “Mum,now that the horses are here, I feel its home, it feels like Kindred Spirits” I must remember this and that warm feeling I felt in my heart that day, that was my Soul speaking to me.
This is how we transported the horses over to their new home. I was quite worried about how they would manage it. But each and everyone of them, jumped up into the truck, as if to say "What ya waiting for? Lets get home!" They had been left behind for a few weeks, while we were preparing fences and they had not been happy about it, they were sad, low energy. But the day they were loaded onto the truck, their faces came alive and they took it all with ease.
The next step was getting them out of the truck. That was a little challenging, but again the horses just dealt with it and jumped off!
Duffy, Eve's rambunctious little mini Schnauzer, waiting for us to arrive.
and we made it! You can see little Duffy following us , in between.
I just needed to have a little Faith (okay a lot of Faith!) and maybe everything would just be alright, as it was meant to BE.
I've been a rolling stone for most of my life. They say your home is where your heart is. I think my heart has found its home.
It is also what is much needed in this moment for us all, in these unbalanced times where fear is setting in for many. We need to remember to have a little faith, faith in ourselves, faith in others and not let the light go out.